Those making use of P2P technology, especially in commercial products, invariably will encounter the bane of many other programmers, patents. In this talk, I will review the demographics of issued P2P and virtual LAN patents from the early 1990s to the present time. I will discuss who is acquiring these patents, the growth curve for such patents, the quality of such patents, and how such patents might be asserted. I will also discuss companies with P2P patents that are advocating that the business world adopt P2P technology, but without mentioning that these companies have P2P patents that might be asserted against those in the business world that find a commercially viable use of P2P.